If you haven’t been keeping up with Booka Nile (Make Them Suffer/Internet Friends) and her quest for love on Married At First Sight Australia… well, there isn’t much to report on because she hasn’t had a lot of airtime since the series started (due to her not being batshit crazy like other contestants), but her marriage to old mate Brett is officially on the rocks following the latest episode and if you’ve been watching closely, you’d have picked up on clues that it’s been a long time coming…
Since their wedding, Booka and Brett have been labelled as the show’s ideal couple. They keep to themselves and hardly (if at all) engage in the drama-filled events which take place on an almost daily basis. From what we’ve seen so far, they’re getting on well and have been making the most of the experiment. But, if you’ve been watching the show religiously (and I mean eyes glued to everything said in their relationship) then you would have picked up on Brett constantly labelling Booka as “intense” or “too intense” in situations. Whether it be conversations, reactions, gestures etc at first, I shrugged it off as a once-off thing, but once I heard it for the fourth time (over the span of a few back to back episodes) then I knew something was going on.
If you’ve kept up with the captions of her Instagram posts, you’d know this is a bigger issue to her than the show is letting on. Also remember, we only see minutes of a day full of filming, so if these subtle nods to the term are being brought up on several occasions, then you know it cuts deeper than what we’ve been shown.
Those of us in the metalcore scene know Booka Nile is a well-spoken, moralistic and strong independent woman who will never shy away from defending or speaking out about issues/beliefs close to her heart. She’s a big supporter of women’s rights and has even gone as far as writing songs about psychopathic bullies who targetted a young woman online for “no reason other than the fact she was an easy target.” So, there is a method to the madness that you see on the show, but for the most part that IS Booka on a daily basis.
Talking about issues close to her heart, something I’ve personally had the pleasure of discussing with Booka is her support and inclusion within the LGBTI community. She may not a label girl per se, but as she’s openly put it in the past, “I’m hardly straight myself” when discussions about her sexuality have arisen. Booka openly (and passionately) backs the community – who for the most part, are welcomed with open arms by the majority of the heavy music scene without anyone batting an eyelid.
So when Brett was engaging in a “playful” joke alongside his bromance buddy Patrick, which lasts (from my notes, just over two weeks) I can see how the gag (for her) would become stale fast and evidence of this was at intruders Liam and Georgia’s wedding, when the lads (obviously drunk) kept the joke going when the newlyweds enquired who was married to who.
During this scene, I had my own eyebrow-raising moment when the conversation changed to Liam’s bisexuality (organic or planted we’ll never know) and despite him telling his fellow contestants it was true, the same-sex/bromance jokes continued. The issue here is pretending to be something you’re not, in front of someone who falls in that category. On one side, I can not only imagine Liam wondering if he has something in common with his fellow contestants – only for them to admit they’re just joking around – but for Booka (and the other wives) to be hounded with that joke over and over again. Sure, once or twice is fine “OMG funny gag guys haha you totes are married to each other lolz!” But when it continues on long after the laughs have subsided, then you’re just beating the horse with a stick.
And for those claiming she was being overly sensitive about the joke, you need to remember that Booka travels the world with four guys in Make Them Suffer and at times can be the only female member on tour. I can guarantee bromance jokes pop up so much that no one would bat an eyelid, but when it’s your partner who is constantly doing it, it’ll wear thin sooner than later.
At the last commitment ceremony, Booka put all of those issues aside and addressed the fact she was going to focus on the positives in their relationship, instead of the negatives which had been building up and clouding her mind. That’s a HUGE call for someone with the aforementioned morals to move on from and shows her commitment to the relationship whilst accepting Brett for himself and his questionable mannerisms.
However that all came to a crashing halt with the show’s Poison Pen Letters assignment (lol nice early The Amity Affliction reference MAFS, I bet fellow heavy scene contestant Jake Edwards would have been frothing at the mouth for that segment upon hearing the name… before he knew what was involved).
The purpose of this activity was for the couples to
stick their noses in other’s businesses weigh in on other’s relationships and offer up some hard-hitting, unfiltered marital advice, from an outsider’s perspective. Patrick (with Belinda scribing) scored the duties for offering advice to Booka and Brett… Unfortunately, Pat forgot Brett even existed and directed the entire feedback letter towards Booka, explaining that she needs to lighten up, talk to Brett because he’s feeling left out, that she has a high IQ and how good her band is (no, actually they’re fucking great mate) and that she can come across self-absorbed and that the world revolves around her. URGHHHH I COULD GO ON BUT FUCK I’M FUMING.
The funny thing is, all of this information was passed onto Patrick via conversations Brett had with him. Booka barely knows the guy, so for someone to come in guns blazing with one-sided anecdotes passed onto him via his BFF, it was always going to go pear-shaped and favour one side. The fact that Brett hadn’t even bothered to bring up with his own wife prior to this taking place is just insulting.
Pat formulated his own views and advice for Booka, based upon ONLY what Brett had spoken to him about… And, once again – IT WAS ALL ABOUT BOOKA, NOTHING ABOUT BRETT – FFS!!!
So, in true Booka form, she followed the advice given to her from Pat (I’m leaving Belinda out of this) and lightened up for a night all about Brett, complete with the Palace Brett (with his face all over the place), all the attention that he longed for, dinner and even a very special song…
Those who don’t see the sarcastic side of what happened aren’t seeing it from the right point of you. Imagine your significant other is talking smack about you behind your back to their best friend, and then that friend (who you barely know) demands you (and you only) give your undivided attention to your partner and make them feel better. Patrick’s secondhand information from Brett about her being self-centred and thinking the world revolves around her is absolutely laughable, especially when Booka is someone who prides herself in helping others on an almost daily basis. You don’t just switch off these characteristics when you’re filming a show, they’re ingrained in your life, so you’re constantly acting on them, which is also why we’ve seen Booka consulting fellow contestants during heated moments throughout the series.
What people tend to forget is that on top of her musical attributes, Booka also has a psychology degree (remember that from the first episode) and has spent the better part of the past eight-plus years helping mental health recovery patients across several psychiatric hostels in Perth. For the ill-informed, she also started a side-business during COVID last year called Sonic Minds, which aims to help people with mental health illnesses through music therapy. What she fills her life with might be “intense” for some, but when it’s what you know love and do, then you need someone who can either work with that, be on the same level or understand the complexity of their life and adapt where they can. We’ve seen Booka sacrificing her beliefs to work with Brett, but when it comes to the shoe being on the other foot, it’s all too much. He also hates metalcore and that’s an instant red flag.
Recently, Booka’s indie-band Internet Friends shared a snippet of a song on their Facebook page titled ‘Beam me up soft/fuck boi‘ which featured a Brett look-a-like (sporting a moustache and all) alongside the hilarious tea-sippin lyrics ‘You’re so predictable and you’ve lost all your appeal / You’re so basic my hymen has gone resealed’. This is what she does. This is her. So tonight’s outburst may be strange for the non-music viewers, but to us, that’s just out Booka, expressing herself through song!
Their next single is set to be fire though!
Time will tell if Booka and Brett come back from this (ha!), but if my calculations are correct, I expect her to write down ‘Leave’ at this weekend’s commitment ceremony! Grab your pitchforks and giddy up because it’s time to #MakeBrettSuffer!
Words by Paul ‘Browny’ Brown @brownypaul
— Paul 'Browny' Brown (@brownypaul) March 23, 2021
Pssst! Give Make The Suffer‘s new album How To Survive A Funeral a spin here